Much Greater Than My Own

Well we’ve been at our ministry site here in Sungai Petani for a little over a week now. The 13 of us (my team and one other) are living in our host’s mom’s house. There’s 11 girls in a room which is sweet and snug and makes for a lot of late night giggles. Life for me, personally, looks like going to a school for children with special needs three mornings a week and helping with a tutoring program for an hour on Tuesdays. We are partnering with a Malaysian Indian church here and they have service on Thursdays and Fridays. They are encouraging us to help with worship (which I love), and for each of us to give a sermon so I expect there to be a lot of growth there (haha pray for me). Ministry hours with non-christians  are limited and we have to be careful about the way we talk about faith since Christian evangelism is banned here and could damage future relationships. This past week I’ve really been wrestling with God about whether or not I’m making an impact, how we are going to reach these people and what God’s plan is for our time here. But He is teaching me a whole lot about His plans, my purpose and how often times His call isn’t always about what I think.

This weekend our group decided to meet up with the rest of our squad a couple of hours away in Penang. The city is amazing and the coffee shops, live music, good food and rooftop views served as a great little get away for our adventure day/sabbath. While walking down the street on our way to some shops yesterday, we passed a homeless man sitting on the curb who waved at us. “Go talk to him,” the Lord said. I kept walking with the group I was with while I wrestled back and forth in my head about what to do and how to do it and if it actually was God telling me to. Finally, I asked my friends to wait while I walked back to the homeless man, thinking about how I would bless him and tell him that Jesus loves him. I went over and shook his hand and told him my name. He told me his and called a couple of my friends over, telling us to please be careful. He told us sometimes the area wasn’t always safe and we should keep all of our valuables in front of us and look out for each other. He gave us lots of tips and with genuine concern said, “I want you to go home safe for your mom and dad. They will be so happy that you are safe.” We thanked him and blessed him and went on our way; and then God started to speak to me.

“I didn’t call you to speak to the man so that you could bless him, Annie,” He said, “I called you to speak to him so that he could have the opportunity to bless you.” 

If I would’ve decided that turning around was too much of a hassle or that it wasn’t God’s call, this homeless man would have never had the chance to share his wisdom, to care for us, to bless us. I turned around naively thinking this man needed to hear that Jesus loved him, but he didn’t need to hear how loved he was, he needed a chance to give the love away. I selfishly made it about me when It had absolutely nothing to do with what I had to offer and everything to do with giving another human the opportunity to feel fulfilled in helping someone else. God’s plan is so much greater than my own! He pays attention to the details. He knows the needs and desires of every human. He knows our past, present and future and things we couldn’t even comprehend. How could I make plans that would ever compare to the plans of the God of the universe? I continue to learn this lesson over and over and I’m sure this won’t be the last time. His plan is so much greater. 

So maybe I don’t know God’s plan for Sungai Petani, Malaysia. Maybe I don’t know what He is going to do, how He’s going to use us, whose lives we will touch and in what way. But I know that I’ve been called. And all He asks us to do is be obedient to that call. We don’t have to figure out what the outcome will be (praise God), we just have to trust that He knows what He’s doing and that the outcome will be glorious.

“One man’s disobedience opened the door for all humanity to become sinners. So also one man’s obedience opened the door for many to be made perfectly right with God and acceptable to him.” (Romans 5:19)